living life

2009-07-25T00:05:00.002+08:00

2 things suddenly dawned on me:

1. my grandpa.
he's officially GONE. cremated, (hopefully) gone to heaven, and will never be able to be here again. it was the last day of his funeral and the realization hit me just before the coffin case was closed. i still remember when i was about 10 years old and he was sitting beside me on the sofa, and that was when he said with a sigh, 'only you would listen to me talk now'. i didn't understand the sadness behind this back then and now i realised that he was lonely and needed a listening ear badly. :/ i regretted now visiting him enough but i'm glad i visited quite a few times last week before he passed away.

he was in pain and suffered from septic infection. but when he woke up once in a while on the hospital bed, he would try his best to talk and gave us a huge smile to lessen our worries. what pained me the most is even at the worst moments of his life, he would try to bluff us that everything was ok, but it's not. :( i miss him already.

2. stagnant and predictable life
browsing through those hollywood gossip websites/blogs, i realised that if i had officially passed my last chance of entering showbiz as a 'young and promising star'. hurhur. i was a fickle-minded kid when i had to write about my ambition (they always have this topic as essay once a year in primary school) and one of my options was being a star. but now, at 23, too old to start my career and try my luck for showbiz, i can officially give up this dream.

lastly, sincere thanks for all who had came/gave their condolences.

2009-07-21T01:15:00.001+08:00

ok it's back at blogger!

and now.. some sad news: grandpa passed away. if you would like to attend the wake pls sms me. thanks.

2009-03-22T12:21:00.001+08:00

shifting to: http://www.xanga.com/jambambi
:)

2009-03-21T04:18:00.002+08:00

it's been a long time since i truly felt so happy! :D

i was on leave yesterday (technically) and met up with kewei to study in the afternoon. then in the evening went for mani pedi with wendy! signed up for this package which in my opinion, is very worth it. the place is called wax in the city. like the services there very much! :DD the girls were very friendly and did a good job. now i have pretty pink fingernails and purple toenails.

the whole session took like 2 hours loh! in the end, marvin waited very long for us :x we went for supper at marina sq hk cafe.. :) didnt know why today i was so hyper.. i talked talked talked from 10pm-3am!!! no kidding, i contributed >50% of the conversation. must be the milk tea.

very long since i had a fun supper session. miss the typical prata sessions... hee.

shit, i totally lost the exam mood. :(

2009-02-15T16:09:00.003+08:00

well... i had a very happening week.

1st, i got accepted for a new job! yay!!! the pay increase is not much, and the benefits are actually not as good as the current job. but i really look forward cos i'll gain more exposure and i'm very very sick of where i am now.

very very happy! :D

2nd, we patched. we had a talk and he promised me things will be better from now on. this is the last chance i'm giving him and i really hope things will work out between us.

3rd, kim's last day. :( i'm gonna miss her so much! she's almost like a mom to me during office hours.. boo. but then, we know we're going to stay in contact and meet up often! so it's more like a colleague-->friend thingy. hee.

4th, we now got mio TV in the house! yayy!! i got to watch free 小娘惹 and other shows.. hee damn excited. but i gotta finish up my clothier report first. :x

5th, went to zoo yesterday! :D pics will be uploaded in fb soon. till then...

2009-02-02T02:13:00.003+08:00

alright i'm a little emo again. -_-
kinda miss him after a while... but judging from past experiences.. this will pass. so i shall just hang on till then.

i think i'm always single at the wrong time. xmas + NY + CNY + v-day + my bday. ok i know.. what's wrong with being single?! sighs. seeing all the couples on the street is one of those things i can't stand, and another is not receiving romantic presents.

:(

btw... i chopped off my hair! (ok, the hairstylist at Reds did)

photo taken by beloved kw. :)

i love it! though it makes me look more geeky, but i feel better without my messy long tresses. Katherine, my hairstylist, even asked me 3 times to make sure i'm certain of this important decision. she's so cute.. haha. well that's because she has very nice maintained hair till her waist and she's a long-hair person.

and yes, it's a break-up haircut. haha. it's truly therapeutic!
and i'm gonna chop it shorter again before my bday in apr :)

2009-01-27T02:28:00.002+08:00

it's funny. i know where i can find the answer, but i seriously have no idea how many days have passed since the break-up. and i won't bother to find out deliberately.

recently i read this book He's Just Not That Into You. it's a self-help book and a movie about it will soon be in the theatres. when i first bought the book, the reason was mainly because there was a movie of the same title coming out soon, so i thought it will be good to read so that i can understand the movie better. i have no idea it's a non-story book.

i know reading a self-help sounds damn pathetic and desperate, but i seriously recommend this book to all fellow babes out there who're stuck in uncertain/unsatisfying/disillusioned relationships. after reading the book, i see my previously relationship better and thank God i'm outta it! i hope i don't sound brainwashed, but the book has certainly shed some light about what kinda men every girl should deserve.

anyway, happy moo year to everyone! :)

2009-01-20T23:39:00.001+08:00

i'm an IFSP! and quite a 'true' one as my results are obviously biased.

Some info:

ISFPs generally have the following traits:

* Keen awareness of their environment
* Live in the present moment
* Enjoy a slower pace - they like to take time to savor the present moment
* Dislike dealing with theory or abstract thought, unless they see a practical application
* Faithful and loyal to people and ideas which are important to them
* Individualistic, having no desire to lead or follow
* Take things seriously, although they frequently appear not to
* Special bond with children and animals
* Quiet and reserved, except with people they know extremely well
* Trusting, sensitive, and kind
* Service-oriented; they're driven to help others
* Extremely well-developed appreciation for aesthetic beauty
* Likely to be original and unconventional
* Learn best with hands-on training
* Hate being confined to strict schedules and regimens
* Need space and freedom to do things their own way
* Dislike mundane, routine tasks, but will perform them if necessary

most of these are true. hmmm.. quite accurate!

2009-01-14T00:09:00.004+08:00

it's strange that human beings only learn how to treasure and appreciate one another after something bad has happened. good ol' memories came to my mind every now and then, and almost everywhere i go i'm reminded of him.

if only the break-up was cold, but he went soft and that was totally unexpected. his response made this more difficult for me, contradicting thoughts are spinning now. i dun regret initiating, but i hate myself for making it sound like there was no turning back. but yet, the logical side of me know that the same old problem will happen if we're still together.

and i'm more surprised when i receive an sms from him, to ask me to keep bokkie.
bokkie is this soft toy he bought from south africa for me, and during his trip he didnt buy anything for himself. it's the first cute thing i receive from him, and somehow i can link bokkie and him.

i seriously want to kick myself for having this small part of me that believes a miracle may happen, and things can go back to how it was. sighs.

it's late at night and the emo is sneaking in again. i should go get some sleep and get rid of this nostalgic feeling.

2009-01-11T01:50:00.002+08:00

as of 10 jan, i'm no longer mrs pang, just back to myself.
it was a decision made after weeks of consideration and it was made harmoniously. there was no argument. just a few Q&As to be sure if that is what i really want.

there are mixed feelings. i feel sad, that we didn't last till the end despite going thru so much. and it's a pity we haven't visited the zoo/sentosa together, and all the short overseas trips we considered sometimes. i feel relieved, like a burden off my chest. i'm scared about the future, will i find someone else again? and how am i going to let my mom know?

packed his stuff in a paper bag, including bokkie. i'm reluctant to hand back tigger and may keep it, think he wouldn't object.

i still love him, but i guess it's how i need to cope with the withdrawal syndromes. the worst heartaches were over now, and i believe this is for the best for both of us.

just a quick update before i doze off. my eyes are closing, it's a long day and tomorrow it's another one too.

btw, dont be shy and date me out! wahahaha

2009-01-07T11:16:00.002+08:00

i've poured all out to you. everything: what i want, what i don't like, and how i feel.

now, it's the answer i'm waiting for.

2009-01-05T01:19:00.003+08:00

outing with SAS peeps (:

i just love hanging out with them because there is always endless entertainment (and drama)! :P

first, it's dinner at thai restaurant at golden mile. loads of yummy food, but i was too busy eating to take any pics.

killing time before food arrives...

my girl jaz and some lychee/water chestnut drink

eric giving the woo-hoo look. lol.

if looks can kill... :x

wahahaha! :)

after dinner, it's spinning ard in shaun's car before KTV

cyclops on the road!

happy family!!
shaun, jaz and eric

we're proud to be with eric during his virgin real KTV experience!

had fun singing emo songs and we all realised that it's the first time we went KTV together! haha. but my voice was gone only after a couple of songs. :(
then, nephew dared me and i downed 0.5glass of beer before K.O and went to lala-land. bleh.
later on, 东方比利 came and 西方彼得 was gone. hahaha!!

well, reached home pretty late that THURSDAY morning, and i still manage to wake up for work! *applause*

:):):)

2009-01-04T01:42:00.003+08:00

有时，我会问自己很多问题。
我到底真正要的是什么？

为什么我还在这份工作？
是为了同事，还是自己？
我会为了适应环境改变吗？
应该乘年轻，出去闯一闯，还是留在这里打好基础？

我是不是可以为了爱情忽略，委屈我自己？
让步和体谅，是有限度的。我开始觉得累了，对他的感觉越来越淡化了。
他，是不是命中注定的那个？
还是，他还在世界的某一个角落，等着我？

有时，想多了，会很累，就不想了。
有时也会觉得自己很无聊。想这么多，有用吗？
不如用利用时间和精力做别的事，可能更有意义。
可是，就是不能控制自己嘛。朋友都说我想太多，杞人忧天。
但，有时我是在给自己最坏的打算。
如果真的有什么不顺利，也可以安慰自己说全都是预料之中，不会这么难过。
哈哈，好像在自我欺骗似的。

2008-12-24T18:09:00.002+08:00

i'm just freaking pissed. and it's all because of misunderstandings and deadlines.
bah!

2008-12-07T02:42:00.002+08:00

after so much guessing from my part, and some reassurance from him, baby and i are more than ok :)

sighs. as insecured as i am, i've to try to get used to it i suppose. give and take, adjust and adapt. some of u may say i'm too 'soft' or whatever, but i can't help it when it comes to him. haha.

some random stuff:

1. got back PRC results. thank goodness, i got a B! :)

2. my naughty cousins have went back today. although i wished i had said goodbye, but i'm glad i got my peace back.

3. had a real sinful but satisfying meal at mcdonalds. every girl needs an occasional dose of junkfood to stay happy! :P

4. WCO exam coming next Friday. gonna start mugging again. shit.

5. some work-related stuff got me real pissed. all i can say is the dumb AND loud people gets their way here.

6. met ling2 and suling for dinner. i realised how much i missed them! boo.

and i've a to-do list for post-exams:

1. Project Clear-Wardrobe (pardon me for the boring name) - gonna sell away clothes i dont wear anymore.
2. bake cookies for xmas!
3. do photo collages of all my friends.
4. catch-up with friends
5. shop for pressies!

i can't wait for exams to be over!!

2008-12-01T01:00:00.002+08:00

i always think the girlfriend is allowed to have higher expectations of her boyfriend compared to the rest of her friends, and the girlfriend should be treated with high priority compared to the rest of his friends, including female friends.

what's wrong with this assumption? isn't this the usual practice?

unless, of cos, the girlfriend is just for company. that she is not the love of his life.

i guess i'm it.

2008-11-26T09:52:00.008+08:00

Gwen Stefani - 4 In The Morning
Uploaded by moebius212

this is exactly how i feel, baby.

*****************************************

4 In The Morning lyrics

Waking up to find another day
The moon got lost again last night
But now the sun has finally had its say
I guess I feel alright

But it hurts when I think
When I let it sink in
It's all over me
I'm lying here in the dark
I'm watching you sleep, it hurts a lot
& all I know is
You've got to give me everything
Nothing less cause
You know I give you all of me

I give you everything that I am
I'm handin' over everything that I've got
Cause I wanna have a really true love
Don't ever wanna have to go & give you up
Stay up till Four In The Morning & the tears are pouring
& I want to make it worth the fight
What have we been doing for all this time?
Baby if we're gonna do it, come on do it right

All I wanted was to know I'm safe
Don't want to lose the love I've found
Remember when you said that you would change
Don't let me down
It's not fair how you are
I can't be complete, can you give me more?
& all I know is
You got to give me everything
& nothing less cause
You know I give you all of me

I give you everything that I am
I'm handin' over everything that I've got
Cause I wanna have a really true love
Don't ever wanna have to go & give you up
Stay up till Four In The Morning & the tears are pouring
& I want to make it worth the fight
What have we been doing for all this time?
Baby if we're gonna do it, come on do it right

Oh please, you know what I need
Save all your love up for me
We can't escape the love
Give me everything that you have

& all I know is
You got to give me everything
& nothing less cause
You know I give you all of me

I give you everything that I am
I'm handin' over everything that I've got
Cause I wanna have a really true love
Don't ever wanna have to go & give you up
Stay up till Four In The Morning & the tears are pouring
& I want to make it worth the fight
What have we been doing for all this time?
Baby if we're gonna do it, come on do it right

(Give you everything)
(Give you all of me)

2008-11-22T14:08:00.001+08:00

何维健 - 今天过去

我们多么用心
说再见都保持冷静
微笑着分手没有人哭泣
我们都没逃避
时间给爱的难题
不论交给谁都无法处理
今天过去我是我你是你
以后就没有权利多给你关心
再舍不得太爱你才忍心放弃
这是对的决定请勇敢飞行
你要的幸福不在我这里
我可以独自把梦延续
还是一样上班来不及
还是一样看夜场电影
我的生活依然规律
仿佛忘记你已离去
还是一样城市太拥挤
还是一样多变的天气
你的生活是否顺心
有没有人走进你生命
今天过去我是我你是你
以后就没有权利多给你关心
再舍不得太爱你才忍心放弃
这是对的决定请勇敢飞行
你要的幸福不在我这里
我可以独自把梦延续
还是一样上班来不及
还是一样看夜场电影
我的生活依然规律
仿佛忘记你已离去
还是一样城市太拥挤
还是一样多变的天气
你的生活是否顺心
有没有人走进你生命
相爱到最后我们变成朋友
不见面没联络像路人的朋友
想念让人失落也不能说出口
某个路口曾经与你擦肩而过
不打扰的温柔是我唯一能做
因为你还相信爱情真的觉得感动
我会在这里再守候
默默看着你再心动不寂寞
是否你也和我相恋过
还是一样上班来不及
还是一样看夜场电影
我的生活依然规律
仿佛忘记你已离去
还是一样城市太拥挤
还是一样多变的天气
你的生活是否顺心
有没有人走进你生命

2008-11-22T10:49:00.002+08:00

changed my signature today. it's one of the episode titles from The Hills and i just feel it makes a lot of sense.

it's the examination + rainy + break-up + recession(this year only, i hope) season again. they always happen together at the end of the year, and especially so during the festive season. maybe it's a reminder to everyone who's lucky not to be affected to count your blessings and treasure your loved ones, your sucky job, and the freedom not to have to study for exams.

i'm a lil' emo today, after some disappointments from the past 2 days. a lot of things had happened/ will be happening, and i hope i can survive those with a light heart.

2008-11-08T23:05:00.003+08:00

i'm allergic to rainy seasons! bleh. went to see the doc today and got prescribed tons of medication, including antibiotics and flu med, plus steroid cream for my never-say-die rashes.

cost me ~50bucks! :(((((
but if i'm finally able to sleep thru one night without the need to wake up and find tissue for my flowing tap, it's worth it.

loonnnggg time since i post any pics/real updates. i'll do it when i got bored of doing my dissertation planning, which is due exactly 1 week later. not to mention no work has been done yet! oh noooo....

btw, my topic is kinda out of the moon. i didnt come up with it, just trying to pick a do-able topic from whatever's that's left (first-come-first-serve basis):

oral rehydration solutions for acute diarrhoeal diseases

pls put your hands together and wish me all the best! :P

2008-11-04T00:33:00.001+08:00

redistribute the wealth..... how bout doing it first?

i love the US elections. it's so much more fun than anywhere else in the world.

2008-10-11T15:14:00.002+08:00

The Time Traveler's Wife
author: Audrey Niffeneger

taken from readinggroupguides.com:
Audrey Niffenegger's innovative debut, The Time Traveler's Wife, is the story of Clare, a beautiful art student, and Henry, an adventuresome librarian, who have known each other since Clare was six and Henry was thirty-six, and were married when Clare was twenty-three and Henry thirty-one. Impossible but true, because Henry is one of the first people diagnosed with Chrono-Displacement Disorder: periodically his genetic clock resets and he finds himself misplaced in time, pulled to moments of emotional gravity in his life, past and future. His disappearances are spontaneous, his experiences unpredictable, alternately harrowing and amusing.

The Time Traveler's Wife depicts the effects of time travel on Henry and Clare's marriage and their passionate love for each other as the story unfolds from both points of view. Clare and Henry attempt to live normal lives, pursuing familiar goals—steady jobs, good friends, children of their own. All of this is threatened by something they can neither prevent nor control, making their story intensely moving and entirely unforgettable.

this is THE romance story of the decade! what attracted me to this book in the beginning was how Niffeneger can spin logical science and a great love tale together. at the start of the book, it's cute and sweet, as little clare interacts with old henry. as it goes on, it's interesting how things that has happened for the past for clare continues when adult clare meets henry in real time. as the story progress, unfortunate events happened and it's a real tear-jerker towards the end, when things happened to henry during his time traveling. but the last chapter brought a bittersweet ending and it closes up the book in a nice way.

the book is first published in 2004 and there'll be a same-titled movie to show in cinemas in dec 2008. i can't wait for the movie, as it shows Rachel McAdams!! however, the book itself is 500++ pages and i doubt the movie can contain all the essence of it, so read the book!

once again, this is a MUST READ! :D

2008-10-11T12:37:00.002+08:00

it's a saturday! yay! no work! no work-related 'issues' and emails! no timelines for today!
okay... i've been pretty stressed this week. so today's the chance to relax and sleep late. :)

i was checking my gmail and saw an email from my school. i always thought that being a tertiary education institute the focus should really be academic-related, and as long as students don't commit crimes or do anything to tarnish the school reputation that's all it matters. well, anyway as long as the school have a good culture of learning, everything else is secondary, right?

that's not what my school thinks.

to my *surprise*, i receive this email few days ago:

Dear Students,

Re: MD*S DRESSCODE

It has come to the attention of top management that MD*S students are not following the Institute’s dress code. Please be informed that starting October, students who do not follow the official dress code will be denied entry into the campus.

Management staff will be stationed at the gates to ensure that all students are properly attired before entering the Unicampus. Roving managers and lecturers will also do their part to ensure that students who are inappropriately dressed will be marked absent and asked to leave the premises immediately.

Students must adhere to the institute’s dress code at all times. Do take note that you are NOT ALLOWED :

1) Singlets, spaghetti-strap tops, shorts or tank tops
2) Revealing attire, off-shoulder or low-cut tops, or tight/tube dresses (tube dresses can be worn with a cardigan)
3) Mini skirts, short dresses (of more than 15 cm above knee)
4) Facial piercings
5) Visible Tattoos (to be covered at all times)
6) Flip flop slippers (unless justified by valid medical reasons)
7) Dyed hair except dark brown and red shades

Please note that MD*S is a place of learning, and the mark of an MD*S student is one who stands out from the crowd through academic excellence and not through inappropriate dressing.

Firm action in the form of counselling, warning and expulsion will be taken against repeated offenders

-the end-

this is ridiculous! i can't believe they're doing this in a tertiary institution, moreover a private one! and the worst of all is students will be turned away if they are found to break any of these rules. this is like secondary school all over again.

i seriously think that the focus here should be on academic-related issues. seriously, MD*S should pay more attention to more important things like ensuring all equipment in classrooms are working, there're enough computers in the IT resource rooms and making sure we get our results back within the next semester after exams. spending time and effort on school attire in a tertiary institution is totally unacceptable to me when they have better things to do! if a student can score a perfect 100, who cares about what she wear to school?

grrr. now i'm reminded that i haven't got my results back for the exams i sat for more than half a year ago. the management should chase Bradford so that we'll get our results back on time instead of spending time doing silly things like that.

2008-10-05T00:19:00.003+08:00

hari raya class gathering

rashikin invited our class to her place for a hari raya gathering! the food was yummy and had fun catching up with my classmates. rarely see them outside class. hee.

oops! caught sneaking around the buffet table

work in progress

JY, me, cindy, chris & minhui

with rashikin. ultra friendly and warm!

group photo!

ladies only

me & cindy

after that, went to chris's place for mahjong:

jianyuan, chris, cindy & puifong
*ps: note jianyuan's BIG GRIN (he's the big winner of the game that night!)

class clique :)

lose a lot of $$!! :((((( looks like i need regular training to brush up my skills.

ps: house gathering pics courtesy of rashikin! :D

2008-10-01T02:29:00.002+08:00

some random stuff...

Mamma mia!

fantastic musical-movie! there wasn't a boring moment at all (though my SO was feeling ~~sleepy~~ too relaxed) and the songs were real infectious! i love every single part of the show. meryl streep and amanda seyfried were really into the characters as well.

MUST WATCH!!! :D

Shopping:

my accomplishment in just 3 days. :P

and here's my new love:

i'm falling in love with ipanema flip flops! soo comfy and pretty :D

that's all for now! it's raining and the best time to sleep. night! :D

2008-09-03T00:12:00.001+08:00

Listen - Beyonce

2008-09-01T22:38:00.002+08:00

work is ok. i have become optimistic due to circumstances.

friends are ok, generally. though there are some who slipped outta my life but a few have made their way back.

family is ok.

finance not ok. super duper broke. sighs. and i didnt even spend much.

love is ok. like, ~~stale~~ peaceful and monotonous. is it supposed to be like this after a while?

can't a peaceful life be really fun and happening once in a while?

2008-08-11T01:07:00.002+08:00

had a very spicy yummy dinner with jaz last weekend:

what a spread!

self taken - by jaz

it was an impromptu meeting and we went vivo looking for food. then we came across this thai restaurant and just went in cos we were super hungry! think that's why we ordered soo much food. lol.

2008-08-10T22:58:00.001+08:00

this sums up the bintan trip :)

if u wanna view more pics, they're available on facebook. lalala...

2008-08-04T18:34:00.004+08:00

hello peeps... missed me? (:
I'M BACK!!!! better than before!! muahahahaha~

pics later. just wanna show u guys what my bf is capable of within a weekend, besides helping me to play parking wars like a hawk. *kisses* to bf for that.

*screenshot removed. dont ask why. :p if u wanna see how my profile, go to facebook :p

so unlike me :(
so is he going to dump me now? *pluck flowers*

2008-07-29T00:45:00.002+08:00

i know, i've been reassured a thousand times, 'it's not you, it's me'.
but whenever this happens, questions keep popping up in my head, and doubt sets in.

i just wonder: why can't i change, and how, so that this won't happen again?

ps. i'm still in, and i know u still are.

2008-07-27T02:57:00.002+08:00

somebody pls stop me from shopping!!

it was supposed to be an innocent study trip, but look at what happened!

sorry baby, i may need to upgrade soon. :(

2008-07-26T00:12:00.002+08:00

forever love?

it's another break-up season. breaking-up seems like the most trendy thing to do now, not that i'm following it or laughing at people who do. but it just feels so sad.

i know 2 sistas of mine who recently split with their ex of a few years. one initiated, the other was informed. no matter the initiator or not, both are victims. in the game of love, nobody wins or lose - and there's no prize either.

i hope this time, baby and me can withstand the storm. not that there's any between us now *cross fingers*, but i hope we'll not be caught in it. the break-up thingy is like yawning; it's contagious and involuntarily. who can control the matters of the heart? one can only influence, but fate is the mastermind of all.

take care babes, i'm just a phonecall away :)

anyway, enough of emo. baby said my posts were 'contradicting' and very 'amusing'. hmph!!!! :PPPPPPPPP

2008-07-22T14:41:00.003+08:00

The Facebook Syndrome:

-checking on mob wars every now and then to deal drugs and attack other mobs
-lady jamine expanding her castle and recruiting vassels
-always watching my carpark, hoping that i can ticket someone
-threw a thong and sent a bday cake to my peeps
-uploading photos and linking people to them
-accepting and installing application requests
-expanding my grassland with strawberries and busy sending lilies to others
-watching my gifts pop out from eggs and watching them grow
-people trading and getting owned
-showing off my miumiu clutch, chanel bag and another tods clutch
-adopted 2 puppies and wanting more
-building my collection of collectibles: carebears, winnie the poohs, little ms/mr men, etc etc.

Jamine is... trying to study but soo distracted.

2008-07-21T21:08:00.002+08:00

it's the exams period again!
& as usual, i'm not even halfway finished with the syllabus. i m sooo dead. :x

anyway, there's a lil' addition to our sjab babes group:

ta-da! let's welcome Vera! :)

*oops, caught her at the wrong time. but i swear she's getting cuter with each passing day!

when i reached her place vera was in the cot sleeping, like all babies do.

and when i saw the pink elephant, i just had to place it beside her!

seperated at birth. haha

here's me trying my best at motherhood:

ok, i still look nooby

while waiting for lene, kw tried to entertain us...

well, we WERE entertained. O.O
besides the pinkie and the brain performance, we gossiped and chatted. usual girlie stuff. oh, and i cam whored quite a bit, will show u guys the pics after i upload them. hahaha.

well, lene eventually made it! and she bought something absolutely yummy, so the wait is worth it.

cheesecake!

made to near-perfection by our dearest lene! it's really yummy, and it's near-perfect because she didnt had enough time to chill it before bringing it over.
thanks babe! :)

some candid shots:

everyone's bz eating

and i had to put this one:

cos lene look so cute trying to shoo cookie. muahahahaha :x

cookie
i think she understand human language. cos cookie was always moving ard and when i asked her to stop moving so that i can take this pic, she obediently stopped and posed! :)

the 3 of us

well, the trip ended with a shot with the mummy:

shall go study now. grr. facebook is sooo distracting!!!

2008-07-05T16:43:00.002+08:00

lalala. it's a rainy and cloudy saturday.
i'm lazy to go out, and mr pang is now in camp. so i've decided to slack at home.

agenda of today:
1. start & finish IPD assignment
2. hit the gym
3. watch lord of the rings on channel 5
4. NO shopping!

sounds boring. bleh.

anyway, i'm so excited cos the sjab babes are going to aina's place tomorrow! i'm going to bring my camera along to take pictures of the pretty lil' ms chow and the rest of us aunties! :p

it's been a looonnggg time since i posted any photos because i haven't taken a single one since May! oh dear, i'm losing it, the enthusiasm and spontaneous part of me. :( i really hope to find it back despite everything that's happening now.

2008-06-22T19:17:00.003+08:00

it's the difficult age for my bro now. as in, my real bro, related by blood (unfortunately).

he used to be this sweet, innocent and courteous lil' boy. but now, he's just this rude, loud and disgusting teenage boy. yucks, i seriously hate this change in him. and now, my place is constantly filled with his rebellious tone of voice and all sorts of stupid reasons he can find not to do his homework. grrr...

the good old times...

:( though he's constantly making everyone angry but i believe he's just at the wrong age. perhaps he's just been the typical teenage boy. hope the phase will pass soon.

2008-06-19T23:19:00.002+08:00

one of my sistas just gave birth to a cute lil' girl! :D
she's such a sweetie. when i visited yesterday at KK hospital, she's wrapped in pink and what a adorable bundle she was! no matter how much noise we make, she will go back to sleep later. :)
no photos of baby and me. long story, but i plan to visit her again soon.

and that's abt the most positive news i've got to update.

since my last post, mr pang has came back and bought lotsa things for me :)
and also, i'm officially turning into ms go-home-at-6. i will not OT anymore. it's another long story, but maybe it's a gd way to make sure i work according to how much i'm paid!

i m soo broke but i sooo wanna shop! sighs.

2008-05-26T02:59:00.000+08:00

22nd bday with jaz, candy, pn and mr pang :)

finally completed another art piece! :)
can go study now. haha feel v happy with this though it's a lil' messy, but that's me!

2008-05-19T04:30:00.002+08:00

it was an extremely busy and screwed week.
blah. all work related, so no comments. except that it's all not-my-fault, misinterpretations and miscommunication did it.

i'm getting used to life without mr pang, which is a gd thing. for once in the longest time, my weekends are dedicated to mom and at home. on weekdays, spending more than 6 hours of my waking hours at home is near impossible. but during the weekdays, it's nice that i can just relax at home and chill, or hang out with mom.

in the recent years, i realized that fine lines on her face has deepened. mostly, they are 'worry lines' and 'laugh lines'. i guess i got all my optimism and think-too-much-syndrome from her. she's really a great mom who doesn't blame her kids when things go wrong, like how i broke a glass pot cover and she have to be the one to pick up the tiny little pieces while i stood there like a 3-yr-old, all cause she dun want me to step ard the area and got hurt. and then she's always trying her best to let us not get involved with the other issues that she and dad face so that we won't worry.

when my grandma passed away, i imagine what it feels like for dad, his own mom dead and he wont be able to talk to her anymore. as i see more white hair growing on my mom, i suddenly realized that she wont be here forever, too. and i better spend more time with her before it's too late.

2008-05-13T00:40:00.002+08:00

i miss my grandma.

she passed away last sunday, before dawn on 4 May.

i woke up to the persistent ringing of my phone, mentally swearing at whoever called so late. but when i heard the sobbing of my cousin at the other end, the anger in me just disappeared and fear instantly filled me. i knew something was wrong. my parents and i literally flew to the hospital, and my father's colleague who drove us there sped down AYE; they're all too experienced to know that rushing down to a hospital in the middle of the night meant life and death.

i could still vividly remembered my grandma gasping for air on the hospital bed. she was bedded in a room where only 'authorized personnel' were allowed, and we were the only ones there, with other relatives whom i only see during weddings and chinese new years. hanging on to her dear life, she was plugged with numerous tubes on her arms, poking into the veins where blood will carry these life essentials into her frail body. her eyes were closed, and she needed a pure oxygen gas mask to keep her alive. a heart rate monitor was right beside her, telling us as every second passed, she's nearer to the other side of the world.

she couldn't see us, but she could hear. when we each took turns to be beside her and to tell her that we're there to walk with her through the last moments of her life, tears filled the rim of her eyes. it wasn't flowing, but it stayed there, like she doesn't even have enough energy to squeeze her eyes tight. i could feel that she wasn't willing to leave, she wanted to stay and watch us all grow up and start our own family, like how she started her own. the determination was strong, but her body isn't. as minutes passed, her heart rate decreased and the fluctuations of the ecg reading went lower and slower. time seemed to slow down, as we all stared at the heart rate monitor and my mind went blank. i thought of all the things i planned to do the next time i visit, and i thought of what i should have done but never did and regretted. but it's all too late.

as she slipped away, her grip slowly relaxed as the last seconds ticked by. finally, the line went flat, and my aunts and mom cried out loud, in great contrasts to the little sobs just a minute ago. the peace was broken, and i guess at that time grandma has left us officially. nurse came in and recorded the time of death, and went on to unplug the plastic tubes from her arm, and then switch off the machines ard her.

tears rolled down my cheeks but all i felt was emptiness. and that was what i felt for the next 5 days of her wake. though i smiled, i laughed, i showed emotions, but i part of me felt empty. someone was missing, and i will never see her smile again.

2008-05-11T01:49:00.000+08:00

it's been sooo long! so sorry folks (if there's still someone who's reading this page), been really bz nowadays with work, school, and my bf.

yeps, liming and i are finally official! prayers do work :)

ta-da!

well, he's off to south africa for ops (NS thingy). so for the next 2 weekends, i'll be available.
so please, DATE ME OUT! :p

i guess my bday celebrations are all over by now. will post up the pics when i'm free to do some photoshop and collage the pics together.

anyway, just to share some thoughts (including sickening sweet stuff), i must say this is the first time i've fallen so hard for a guy. i never thought i would, till he came along. i even thought of photoshopping our pic, and even daydream about spending the rest of my life with him! this is crazy, but i like :p

thinking back, i used to frown when i heard my girlfriends changing their habits just because their SOs disagree with them. and i always wonder how anyone can complain about their bfs and yet, she still loves him even though he seems like a bastard. but now, i understand.

omg, i just realised i sounded soooo eeky. but that's how i've changed. and i don't care what you guys think, i have no backbone whatsoever.
nobody knows me better than i do, maybe except him. :p

2008-04-08T05:59:00.002+08:00

you guys must be wondering why the hell i m up so early.
well, a girl has to do what she has to do. and me, the procrastinating one, has finally felt the burning urgency of the SED assignment, due tomorrow!
shit.

anyway, i'm doing my research and unintentionally found numerous pictures of deformed infants, including dissected ones. that really woke me up and i feel really disturbed by those images. i've seen the insides of a healthy mice before, but never any organism with severely deformed organs and features.

i truly feel that i'm lucky to be born normal and healthy. through dozens of statistics found on the web, many many babies brought to this world are not without some form of inherited diseases or malfunctioning organs. others, may just be a matter of bad luck that happens somehow during the developmental process of the fetus.

perhaps, one has to see the bad side of life before realising the goodness of his own. i now realised that i'm damn lucky to be 'normal'.

thank God for the healthy being i am. :)

2008-04-06T10:00:00.006+08:00

i'm in such a HUGE dilemma now!!!

how arr....

should i buy this:

this:

or this:

v hard to decide leh :(

2008-04-02T17:38:00.003+08:00

YAY! EXAMS ENDED! :D

pale and drained

i was really exhausted but still went to PS for a haircut and to chill. was hoping to get a good book to read at starbucks but can't find any in Times bookstore. :( so i came back home after a comforting bowl of oyster mee sua.

and that was when someone told me over the phone that i look overweight! wanted some ice-cream but totally not in the mood to eat anymore after the conversation. sighs. better watch my diet now that i'm not exercising much.

and to add to my 'top 10 ~~excuses~~ reasons for not exersing', my mp3player died on me! :(( i know it sounds damn lame to stop exercising just because i have nothing to listen to. buuuttt... how to exercise without music?!

i wanna get this now:

mr pang said he will buy for me. see when loh, then i can start hitting the gym again. :p

2008-03-28T11:06:00.002+08:00

today is...
3rd day from PDA
5th day from EM

i m sooo screwed. i only did 3 topics yesterday! :( regretted not writing notes/revising for the past few weeks.

then, wanted to wake up for breakfast today. but what's the time now? haha.

btw, i had fun with jess yesterday! it was good studying with her, because we will pull each other back to the mugging mood once any of us gets distracted. i was so hardworking that i only went home near 12am!

oh, also had lunch with wei. that lucky girl is going to denmark for attachment may-jun. feel envious but yet, happy for her :)

anyway, today is PAYDAY!!!! :D

2008-03-27T00:10:00.002+08:00

see a teeny weeny bit of effort. don't dare to put my hopes high. slow and steady win the race. :)

anyway, it's been darn long since i saw jess and i'll be meeting her for studying session tmr! :D can't wait man! there're just so many things i wanna tell and share.

revision progress is darn slow. shit. i'm supposed to finish EM today but i'm still.. halfway thru. oh noooo...

ok must start mugging now :D

2008-03-25T22:54:00.002+08:00

just when i was giving up on him, he came back.

is this a sign from above? or perhaps, i'm just thinking too much.

i'm tired, whatever i wanted to say, i can't find the words anymore.

vista sucks. bleh.

2008-03-25T03:36:00.003+08:00

mozilla firefox rocks!!! :D now i can watch flash!! whee! *crossing fingers.

anyway, i dont know it's vista or ie's (internet explorer) fault, but i have problems with flash player on ie. which literally translates to cannot-see-video-or-play-viwawa! :( tried to download flash player 9 but it only supports XP!! sheesh, i wonder when vista will be supported by all these essential stuff!

oh, btw, my windows media player died on me too. i went to find the latest version on microsoft and it also supports XP only. BLAH. then, i had to depend on itunes for a while but it can't play wma without converting it to its own unique file type. -_-

luckily, bought my new samsung phone recently and samsung has its own media player! whee!! :) can watch videos and play music liao. FINALLY!!!!

anyway, in both situations, i just prayed and download the latest version, hoping that vista can do what XP does. and my conclusion?

WAIT LONG LONG MAN!

2008-03-24T01:17:00.004+08:00

ta-da!
after some thoughts, i've decided to cheer up and dun let things that aren't really significant affect me, as compared to really important issues like the US elections and global warming.

therefore, i'm back to my cam-whoring days again. lalalala. :p

anyway, i ~~wasted~~ spent my weekend meeting the fo5 peeps: lix on fri, then simone and yeewen on sat. some things we did on saturday:

- having dinner with yeewen's godbro, who happen to be the bf of my sec sch junior! omggg!! the world is so damn small. no wonder i find him familiar, cos that junior of mine had his face on her friendster for the past 3 years! hahaha. should buy toto man.

- catching-up/ talking-cock at starbucks. it's really nice to relax into the armchairs, sipping coffee, and let the time past. oh, and the lame jokes too. haha.

- trying to play matchmaking for each other. i mean, simone not included. haha.

but all the time, i wasn't feeling very carefree leh. cos i kept thinking about my untouched revision and assignment. sigh. i miss that no-school-work-only life i led 1 yr ago.

took some pics with my new handphone but the quality is really unacceptable compared to my cam. next time shall just bring my cam out. :)

i love elva's album 1087. some of the songs really touched me in a way no other song can do.

emooo

2008-03-22T02:52:00.002+08:00

it's the emo moment again.

just came across a blog entry of my friend, who also watched The Leap Years.

the most romantic film i've seen in such a long time

and it reminds me of *ahem* someone loh.
sian x9999999 times.

well, should think of happier things to look forward to:
-steamboat with f05 peeps early apr
-dinner with lsct babes mid apr
-bonus arriving end mar --> shopping!!

oh and even something sooner: meeting simone and lix tmr!

who needs boyfriends when you have good friends? :p
UNLESS, u're the only single, unmarried one. *CHOI!

2008-03-22T00:36:00.002+08:00

caught 10000 BC with lix just now and it's quite a nice show!

it's not an extremely must-watch show, and the plot is the typical hero-saves-the-tribes kind, but i just like the fact that every detail links together in the show. and camilia belle is soo pretty in the show!

Evolet

i love how her blue eyes sets her apart from everyone else in the movie. and who would have thought anyone can look good in that kinda hairstyle?

And watching the show is like watching Walking with Dinosaurs. The mammoths, dinosaurs, and all the other kinds of beasts in the show are made to that kinda effect. and it's interesting to watch how men interact with these animals and how they managed to escape.

anyway, dun think anything's factual in the movie. they just lump everything that will make the movie look good. like linking the snowy mountains to the tropical rainforest to the desert and making the distance look like you can cross all of them within a month by foot. or having the sabre-tooth tiger, mammoths, dinosaurs and huge aligators together during the same era. though i'm no scientists, but i think they dun belong to the same period.

yawn. sleepy now. there goes my good friday, havent been studying or doing my assignment. could someone pls gimme a kick to start working, please?

2008-03-21T15:27:00.002+08:00

i realise that i'm drifting away from the people i love.

-my sjab clique
-teban girls
-f05 peeps
-lsct babes
-the sas boys

and most importantly, i'm drifting away from Him.

i promise i'll be a gd girl and meet up more often k? :)

2008-03-20T01:19:00.003+08:00

i soooo need to whine!!!

adjectives: tired, exhausted, irritated, fustrated, stressed.
it's like i've been injected with this horrible cocktail of emotions, and i sooo need a break. :(
exams are 1.5 weeks away, and i'm starting to feel helpless and very stressed now. just had PDA revision class and i know nuts about this module! omg. i'm so gonna faint. and i'm super worried that i may just fail this module.

it's at times like this that i either:
-can't be bothered with the rest of the world and shut myself up. self-healing occurs.
-needs someone to talk to, to lean on, and to feel comforted with. he is required.

many a times, i will opt for the 2nd option. but right now, i dun have a choice, since i can't feel his presence here anymore.

Wishlist for my 22nd

2008-03-18T00:54:00.003+08:00

Some items off my wishlist. :p

1. Coach Bleecker Canvas Tote

2. Kate Spade Tarrytown Quinn

3. Epilator

4. Vouchers!

i can shop almost anywhere, everywhere. :)
*preferred: Borders, Topshop, Takashimaya, Isetan, Tangs, or simply, an Angbao.

5. Chocolate Buffet @ The Countyard, Fullerton Hotel

The Courtyard features a rapturous Chocolate Buffet of luscious chocolate creations, including an unforgettable Chocolate Fountain, from Thursday to Saturday evenings. For a blissful end to a hectic week, wind down with this array of comforting desserts and indulge the chocolate lover in you. Complement the chocolate delights with a glass of delicate dessert wine at just a little more. The Chocolate Buffet is available from 8pm to 11pm.

6. Spa resort

:) where's my sugar daddy?

2008-03-16T00:00:00.002+08:00

chill-out @ starbucks

i finally got moving and made this. :)

haven't blog for the longest time in the world.
oops, correction: i haven't blogged properly for quite a long time.
just some casual updates:

i'm now well-fitted to my new place. in fact, my study/coffee table just arrived today! perhaps it's because now that i've got my own room, i haven't been going out much nowadays. i'll be at home during the weekends and just chill, do some homework, or hit the gym.

work is more bearable now that project initiations are more or less completed. i've gotten more used to the workload and multi-tasking between many different things. gambatte!!

watched The Leap Years with Baby and it's the most romantic show i've watched in a long time. a must watch! after watching the show, i've a lot of thoughts in my head. it's my mind-wandering nature to think abt things Li-Ann asked herself and i'm starting to have some doubts too. maybe i'm thinking too much but, i'm really scared that one day, everything will just end. i really hope that there'll be a happy ending.

exams coming :x assignments due-ing. i'm so dead.

2008-02-20T01:41:00.002+08:00

i guess i've always been going round and round in circles.
cycles.
fixed patterns.
the same damn signs that i knew but ignore time and time again, thinking that it will be different this time.

the half-empty promises
the disappearing acts

i dont know why i even bothered trying. it now saddens me more to know that unlike logical explanations, what you reap does not equal to what you sow.

2008-02-10T02:12:00.001+08:00

i just killed 2 cockroaches!!! omg. so scary. and they're huge black ones too! thank god they didn't fly *touchwood* else i would have fainted or something.

crap.

shall blog abt happier cny happenings when i have the time to :)

2008-01-27T13:45:00.000+08:00

i hate it when i make an effort to talk and update him on my plans, and all he said is a 'ok'.

i think it just means he's absolutely NOT interested in my future cos he dun even think of participating in it.

it's the hot-cold-hot-cold period again. grrr.

2008-01-23T23:24:00.000+08:00

some random things in life that i just wanna let out / whine.

my eyes are itching now cos of the damn cleansing oil/ eye make-up remover. at the rate i'm rubbing, i'll have fine lines very soon. sheez. not to mention the stupid zits that keep popping out on my face. argh.

i hate it when i procrastinate. the work will pile up and one day the power of gravity and the inability to balance will cause the stack to topple, making it even harder to juggle. shit.

my boy (ok, sort of) is there but not really there. sometimes i wonder what's keeping me on the rope, and then realised that i don't have an answer. logically speaking, he may be a waste of my youth, which is the most precious time of my life because women's value depreciate with time (unlike men) and i only have a few years to spare. however, nothing makes sense in love. thus, i cannot make judgements based on logical reasoning. so it brings me back to square one.

i still can't wake up early enough to be punctual for work. and i think my boss is beginning to notice. shit.

i lost my t-pin once again!!!!!! oh shucks.

i've tons of shows on my hard disk and computer but i dont have time to watch them. it's like my time and energy are sucked away and i can no longer have the luxury to have time to myself. i'm an introvert and i need time along to recharge, yet i can't. i'm drained.

i better go sleep now before i explode.

2008-01-19T22:13:00.000+08:00

Peini's bday - Nov 07

Candy came up with the idea of getting Gobi cakes! look at how cute they are!

we went to mind cafe and had a lot of fun with boardgames and dumb card games.

can't believe we look stressed when it's just a game of monopoly!

<3 nintendo monopoly!

candy & yukun looked happy and relieved that they survived another rd.

jaz is so pro that she's getting bored alr. haha.

and then, we present her with the prezzies.

and then, we took the usual couple/friends pics. :)

candy & jaz

mh & pn

yukun & candy

i think pn must have really hated yukun..

that's all folks! :D

2008-01-19T21:50:00.000+08:00

a super-belated HAPPY 2008 to all my friends and loved ones!!!! :)
i realised that since i started schooling, i've deviated from the online world too much. people are starting to get worried of my absence from the virtual world. better come back online before i'm forgotten :p

my new yr resolutions:
- be punctual for work, and cap at 15mins late for all personal appointments
- recycle more
- do my tutorials and assignments
- keep up with bills and payments
- exercise at least once a week

nothing much to update, except that i just came back from BKK (again!).
this time, it's a biz trip. went with my company for team-building. didn't enjoy myself much cos of some events that happen, sigh. well, i'm still quite pissed and agitated when people ask abt it, but perhaps i 'self-sabo' lah. won't allow this to ever happen to me again!
well, i extended for 2 days for some personal shopping and it was half-enjoyable as my previous trip, cos of the company. :x came back broke and gained lots of pimples.

alrighty, will start posing up my photos soon. very laggy :x

2007-12-26T02:48:00.000+08:00

i DID enjoy my xmas!! :D
BUT, i missed xmas service! :x oh dear...

anyway, first met up with simone, lix, jess and yeewen to watch Warlords.

super complicated plot that displayed the cruel realities of life. besides linking parts of it to my own messed-up situations, i also drooled over hunks. *slurp. a must watch! but i have to say, this movie drained 1/3 of my energy cos it took up some brainpower and stirred some emotions.

after the movie, we went cafe cartel to chill and catch up. hehe.

and then, in the evening, went to met up with vinson and jas, our family reunion! :D
it's been more thana yr since i met vinson, and he haven't changed a bit, maybe just a lil' more bitter bout life than a few yrs ago. love them to bits :)

after the reunion, i rushed to the loo and managed to catch the last bus home. yay!
will upload the pics when i have the time. tata.

2007-12-25T11:17:00.000+08:00

xmas eve sucks. work ate me and left nothing at all.
not to mention i upset my great buddies :/

so.. i'm gonna make sure i enjoy my xmas day!

MERRY CHRISTMAS PEEPS! :)

and thanks to all who've wished me too!

2007-12-11T01:38:00.000+08:00

seriously, i think i'm becoming uglier everyday.

my dark rings are sinking deeper and deeper, like they're aiming for my cheeks *cross fingers*. i have patches of overdue tanned skin that should lighten with the general whole but they just refuse to fade away. my pimples are making a come back every now and then. my eyebrows need a trim, so do my hair. my rashes on my arm are re-appearing.

and inside, i don't feel any more beautiful either.

work is starting to eat me up, and the politics in office made me stronger, but also more evil. i admit, i do have evil thoughts but it's just a matter of time before i execute them. i don't know y, i can't help it but think bad when my colleagues screwed up, especially when i'm involved. i hope He'll help me to keep myself in check, i really don't wanna become the person whom i critisized. and yes, i need to treat ppl with genuine kindness and let the bad all evaporate away in the air-con. i need divine help to do that, and to remain sane.

and deep in, somewhere down there where the heart is, there's a sense of insecurity and doubt. there's this little star that's floating ard, trying its hardest to shine in the dark chambers of fear. it's still trying.. and trying.. hoping that one day, it will be able to lit and brighten every corner forever.

2007-12-09T02:54:00.000+08:00

i watched my first R21 movie with simone today.

how can anyone miss a ben stiller show?!
this movie is really funny. many hilarious parts are presented in x-rated ways and the language's really crude sometimes. probably the reasons y this show is rated R21.

oh met up with yeewen too for dinner and coffee, before and after her work respectively.
and my new chill-out place will be TCC. yummy potato wedges and cheese dip plus coffee frape. the perfect comfort food for a tired soul.

yep, i may appear normal and happy. but really, sometimes i am and sometimes i'm just bluffing myself.

2007-12-08T04:16:00.000+08:00

something hit me and brought me to my senses. like, hey, wake up!!! y r u doing this?! u ain't doing yourself any favour at all. this is soo unfair to you.

oh well, sigh.
u know, someone, in fact many someones, told me that it doesn't matter who you love, but it's who you meet at the right place and the right time.

reality bites.

2007-12-06T01:08:00.000+08:00

yesterday was a short work day cos boss took urgent half-day and we're allowed to leave early so that we can attend company event - Stardust movie!
actually, there's a short presentation for long-service and other kinda awards but i skipped it with a few colleagues to walk ard :p certainly beats sitting ard clapping for ppl whom i don't know and don't care.

watching it a 2nd time doesn't mean it's any less good; it's just as nice to watch! :)
maybe i'll buy the DVD.

i love fairytale endings, cos it'll nvr happen in reality.

2007-12-05T04:14:00.000+08:00

i guess sometimes, a girl just need to talk/laugh/scream it out; just letting all of it go.
thanks baby for tahan-ing my nonsense, really appreciate it.

and really, i'm glad for teng buddy.
you definitely don't agree with what i do, but thanks for being there :) can't wait for you to be back.

anyway, 2nd day at work wasn't too bad.
boss is back! but poor her is sooo tired from all the biz trips and the ever-changing and screaming timelines/clients. plus she needs to work with unreasonable folks from the other dept. sighs.
and then, i attended my first PC forum! was so exicited, though i'm exhausted by the time 830pm comes but it's fun to sit with fellow colleagues off-hours and minus the formality otherwise expected during daytime. it's a totally new experience for me.

hope my hair dries soon or it's gonna be dawn soon :/

2007-12-03T23:48:00.000+08:00

it's the first day of work again!
after such a long break, i've forgotten most of the timelines and everything that seemed very important before i went on leave. :/ not to mention my unread 400++ emails which i spent the entire day reading. gosh.

it's not a v gd day because..
the moment i reach office, i was told that i need to shift to another cubicle. NOW. -_- so ok.. i moved like mad for 2 hours before lunch and was sweating in an air-con environment. thankfully, xiaoxiaomei came to help me. hehe.
do i only have the afternoon to read my emails. by the time i'm done reading them all and doing a lil' ad-hoc stuff, it's knock off.
even though i've shifted to a new cubicle, my colleagues all suan me and said that i looked like i've been sitting there since i came. idiotic. haha. well, my space IS a lil' cluttered but it's neater than before alr!! :p

anyway, here're some very overdue pics of mom, bro and me's trip to some hong kong cafe at IMM.

yuan yang baked rice
tofu
seafood horfun

my smelly bro

i just wanna take more pictures of him before he becomes not-cute soon. hehe.
btw, that lazy boy scored quite good for his PSLE. :) yay!
glad for him cos he can go to a good school.

gotta go sleep now!

2007-12-03T07:59:00.000+08:00

yesterday was shopping day with simone.

we met up and went for lunch first, then to Akira warehouse sales.
bought my radio-CD-alarm-ipod-docking audio machine, or whatever u call it. yay! i'm gonna start using it when i move to the permament place. no space for now.
then, went to IMM and shopped. bought hairbands and nail polishs. :)

and thanks simone for carrying it for me thruout shopping! never realised it weighs quite a bit til we went home. :x

i fell asleep listening to emo and those positive break-up songs (if i can find them).
it's like... i'm tired, but i can't sleep. sigh.
then, i asked the forbidden question, and i think it's only right that he didn't answer. there must be some valid and important reason that i don't know, or it's simply to my benefit that i remain ignorant.

anyway, i have to get ready for work in 20mins. work will numb me i guess, and i'm glad to be.
for the next 2 years i will be busy and juggling my time between work and studies. can u imagine i need to take 4 modules next sem!!!?? gosh.
*tata*

2007-12-01T14:29:00.000+08:00

vegeterian beehoon is one of the best breakfast anyone can get.yum.
minus the fake meat of cos. i dun fancy that, just like loads of vegie and tofu, flooded with the gravy!! :)

anyway, FPOM paper was good! :D
maybe i wont get good marks, but at least i'm v certain that i will pass. hee. and i didn't even study much for this.
all thanks to Kumar!!! his lectures often left impressions in my head. and the topics he pick damn zun. hehehe. i daringly skipped 2/8 chapters cos no mood to study.

anyway, went out with baby yesterday. it felt different.. like we're just friends but we're not really friends. u know what i mean.
sighs.

it's like a choice between contentment and rights. i don't know the exact words to use.
i know this is a mess and yet, i happily let myself fall into this trap. i know my happiness will be short lived and the hurt will last for a long time afterwards but still, i'm still living in delusion. there's an angel and a devil speaking to me, and this time the devil spoke louder. the angel is trying desperately trying to pull me outta this mess but still, i ignored her.
actually, it's like investing but i don't know anything bout what i'm in for. i'm just praying hard that i'll get my returns accordingly and all is worthwhile.

2007-11-28T21:49:00.000+08:00

my marketing paper is so doomed!! :( :(
out of the 3 questions, 1 is anyhow hantum, 1 is answered fully, an the last one i anyhow scribbled in point form cos i don't have time.
die liao. *major frown.

i must make sure this dun happen on friday again.
jia you!!

2007-11-27T14:31:00.000+08:00

tmr's the official start of exams.
to be frank, i've just finished reading thru my notes last night. i haven't started on the tutorials yet, not to mention the past yr exams.
damn scared i'll fail :/ it's afterall, my first attempt at biz/mgmt modules.

there're so many things in my mind now, mainly abt him.
after weeks of anticipation, he's back last weekend and we met up.
in the meantime, perhaps this is the best we can manage this relationship, if there's any.

complicated and mind-hurting things aside, ling has left my company and i'm truly gonna miss her. she's the best supervisor anyone can have, really. :x and probably she's the only one who doesn't mind my mis-punctuality. haha.
we went to AquaMarine to literally celebrate her leaving, cos we're all glad that she's going to a better world.
*pics after exams.

alrighty, i better get my bum outta here and mug in the library.
tata!

2007-11-08T01:55:00.000+08:00

happy deepavali peeps!

it was a beautiful wed morning because i was given half day! slept til 10plus and received a lovely morning greeting. hee.

but the rest of the day is just hectic and full of shocking details regarding my colleagues and work. nothing i can disclose here. but let's just say that i'm thankful for a gd boss and my reasonable workload so that i can concentrate on doing things right.
what's quantity when quality is swept down to the drains? i think some ppl just need to wake up on their idea.

and then, the bank person screw up when she put the docs at the wrong address. i even asked her twice if she got the right address and she said yes without hesitation, ending up losing the docs to God knows where. not to mention that some personal details were inside too, and no apologies at all! grrr.

omg i m gaining inches as days go by. horizontally of cos. i really need to exercise since diets obviously don't work.

2007-11-04T04:46:00.000+08:00

it's been ages since i turned on my laptop. and since i'm here i shall update a lil'.

as everyone probably know, PN and i went to BKK last weekend.
i spent a lot, a lot, a lot of money there. now, i'm broke and tired (just recover from the trip) but v happy! our trip was pure shopping and eating. everyday our itenary will be something like eat, shop, eat, shop, eat, sleep. and our only resting time during the day will be mealtimes and perhaps, a tea break. i walked till my legs literally went a lil' numb and robotic; unfeeling of what's going on. luckily, thai foot massage saved my leg. hahaha.

i bought:
15 tops
9 dresses
2 skirts
2 pairs of shorts
4 pairs of pants
5 bags
2 clutches
7 pairs of earings
5 necklaces
2 watches
3 pairs of shoes

not to mention, many more gifts for my friends/family that i won't list down. :p

seriously, i shopped till i'm SICK OF SHOPPING!
there was this moment that came last sunday, when i suddenly got v irritated by the signs of prices and bargaining. and then, i shopped till i almost drop, cos i can feel my legs protesting and threatened to turn jelly when i was at central world (our ngee-ann city alike). fortunately, we had more coffee breaks on sunday so they're appeased and didn't give up on me. hehe.
though i'm a lil' turn off by shopping now, but i still look forward to BKK trip at jan 08 (and possibly, jun 08 too). hehe. food and clothes are darn cheap!

ok enough about my BKK trip. sorry peeps i don't have pics to share cos i left my digicam at home >.< just went to watch Stardust with simon et al and I LOVE IT!!

it's a perfect combination of adventure, romance, comedy and fantasy. every part of the story is very well joined together and the ending is surprisingly pleasant. i give it 5/5 popcorns!!!!
a MUST WATCH!.

after that, we went to mind cafe and chill before going back home.

sighs. if only he's here with me.

2007-10-24T02:06:00.001+08:00

yes! we've found a flat! :) deposit paid, papers signed too!
my future location will be at jurong west. those ~~kpo~~ interested to know can ask me directly. hee.
*thanks May for helping with some FAQs :)

supervisor has officially freed me from all duties related to current dept.
yay! now i can fully concentrate on clearing backlog and my trainings. i felt like the big fat load on my shoulders has been taken off. i can now finally breathe with ease. :p

for tea-break, i had yummy muah-chee and cheesecakes. courtesy of ling2. hee.

lalala... it's a beautiful day!
thank God for making all these happen. :)

2007-10-23T00:35:00.000+08:00

i met Hidaya on the way home just now!
at first, i couldn't recognise her cos she has this cool spunky hair now that is so different from few yrs ago. if u know her, since pri sch she had hair reaching her butt and her mom will always tie her hair in fanciful but neat knots and it's almost different everyday.
when i saw her today, her hair was tied into a short ponytail. what caught my attention was her top, which said 'spectacle hut'.
the only petite malay girl i know who takes 143 to teban gardens and studied optometry is her, and my deduction is right! :) best thing is, i even stay on the same block as her! haha.
she's such a babe.

anyway, work's fine. though, again, my female boss was having mood swings again.
but lunch made up for it. it was with karen faith @ ikea.
yummy chix wings n poached salmon! :)

and company's teambuilding location is fixed: @ BKK mid-jan! woot! i'm thrilled~

well, gonna look at the bright side of life. teehee.

2007-10-21T23:31:00.000+08:00

the past few days had been nothing but hectic.
thinking back, i realise that my moodswings were pretty bad. and it may get worse. :/
i'm usually the girl with the balanced hormones and when not agitated, can be as cool as cucumber 24/7. i can be a chili padi though, when provoked.

but these days, i flare up too easily, and often allow myself to get upset with/without any reasons. sighs.
i hope the BKK trip will improve things though :)

over the weekend, i'm pretty touched by a few things that may be small, but just shows that friends do care. and i'm so glad to have them by my side :)

oh anyway, the deal is off again :/ things are not smooth on the seller's side, so we're gonna continue with house-hunting while wait and see.
can't wait to move. somehow, i dun feel comfortable here, and i wanna start afresh after i move. i'm gonna dump away all the unneccessary and harmful things and people outta my life. that way, i'll be happier.

2007-10-21T12:41:00.000+08:00

update: he replied my msn message and have not disappeared completely. to be fair, i've removed the previous post.
God, i think i'm too easily appeased.

last night, i became the taxi-snatching bitch. i felt so powered and smug. as the cab drove away, the indian lady was pointing fingers at me to her friend and her expression was something to laugh at. but actually, i was queueing up in the first place and she wanted to cut in but i fought back. nevertheless, revenge was sweet. :)

i managed to reach Shahid's party in time for cake cutting. felt bad for making simone and michelle wait for me. :/ then, we rushed to lix and yeewen's and most have left by the time we reached. so, i made it up by staying overnight and playing indian poker with their friends. i turned lobster red after a few mouthfuls of concentrated vodka, not to mention i was itching all over. didn't get drunk but i feel more relaxed though v heated.

after checking out, had mac breakfast and went back home. :) thanks lix for the ride!

with great friends, who needs bastards for company?

2007-10-15T00:47:00.000+08:00

i don't know what gave my parents the idea that i'll ever get married.
they keep having 2nd thoughts on a 4-rm flat, saying that it's too expensive and not wise cos eventually i'll 'get married and move away. then the house will be too big and we'll have to sell the flat away. not to mention the legal fees we have to pay to remove your name.' bla bla..
seriously, i doubt i'll be attached, much less married' anywhere in a few yrs, unless it's him. but he already said he 'don't wanna gimme false hope', so i hope to get a bigger flat so i can live comfortably and not cram with my smelly bro. hehe.

anyway, spent sunday with jaz and simone. :)
we hunted for prezzies, and then went to the mind cafe.
simone and i were very disappointed that cheese mozzels ran out :( but still, we ordered other fat food and drinks. hee. i had the most 'life' in the game of life (which helped me to win the game eventually, cos i had the lowest salary during some part of the game) and wished i'm like this in real life, too. :x then we played somemore games before we all left for food. and then talk cok for a bit going back home. most of the time, they're just naming out guys and doing matchmaking for me.
but truly, thanks jaz for the treat and both for trying ur best to find me a bf. haha.. don't keep ur hopes too high hor.

i'm at this vulnerable stage in life where i need company to keep myself sane.
talk cok sessions with gd friends, crazy ktv times, shoulder to cry on, and long chats to share joy/woes are really what i need. one of my secret fantasies when i was young is that i can buy a row of bungalows and house every gd friend in them, so that we can play with each other and never lose contact.
i still like the idea, except that i know now life is more than just play and studies. maybe i can set up a bar counter and hire jaz as my part-time bartender, and also franchise a starbucks somewhere nearby to sip on some coffee while watching the rain fall, with the warmth of friends.

back to reality, i feel so alone. :/

2007-10-14T03:30:00.000+08:00

had a mad-rush week.
couldn't bring myself to go back to work today. there're still unfinished chunks of work waiting for me on my desk but i just can't bring myself to office.

and then after a long time, i talked to LM again. i learnt some things that i didn't know before. if only i could turn back time..

just watched 胭脂扣 on tv. it's my 1st time watching it and i'm deeply affected by the love 如花 had for 十二少. it's a v deep show and nothing can describe exactly how i feel now.

but i do learn something from the show. nothing lasts forever, not even true love. perhaps it's best to have sweet memories to remember by, rather than sacrficing too many things just to make that love lasts longer. nothing's worth it cos everything is transient.

2007-10-08T01:32:00.001+08:00

whee i can go online again! :) with a small admin fee, mom had called up Singtel and requested them to transfer the line to my aunt's place (where we're all bunking in for now). woohoo!

well, this will allow my spending-ban to work better. at least i won't get to spend money at home.

in other more positive news, we've found a flat! YAY!! :)
it's at jurong west, and if we take 334 it'll be 5 bus stops away from jurong east (the agent counted for us). what i love about it:
-3rd storey. i've a altophobia.
-few bus stops away from JE sports complex.
-new environment. i desperately need a change.
-i get my own room. :) away from my smelly bro. hehe.

geographically, i know that transport wise it's not better than teban but heck, at least 334 is consistent with its timing and won't screw up like what i have now. i can wait 20mins for 2 buses and none came. sheesh.

now, i'll just have to wait for papers to be drafted out and sign.
can't wait :)

****************************************************

a newly accquinted friend (i think) advised me on relationships.

'u need to be more gentle and ladylike. guys dig feminine girls.'
absolutely true. i've heard this a thousand times before from same-age friends but i just shrug them off, thinking that they're just typical MCPs, or perhaps just the usual thinking. but hearing it from this new friend made me think twice and shut me up. i can't help but agree with him. looking ard me, >80% of female friends and colleagues ARE really girly/feminine. maybe i really need to walk like a girl (advised by simone) and watch my speech.
i think being Head of Training in whatever CCA i joined drained my feminine side. sighs.

'u're only 21 what! still young... when u're near 25, finished your studies and have a more stable career, then it's time to find a husband. by that time, same age guys are no longer in NS, started working, and are more mature. not to mention older men with stable careers.'
i've heard the 'but u're only 21 what!' line more frequently than my trips to the loo and i'll immediately respond with the line 'but value of women depreciate with time u know!'. hearing a older guy telling me that it's not too late to start finding even at mid-20s gave me hope. knowing the logic given from him makes me feel better.

'good guys finish last.'
i'm still a lil' skeptical about this.

'sad to say, u'll never marry the one u love most. in most cases lah.'
this is the absolute cruel truth. i can even see the sadness in his eyes when he said it. deep down, my heart aches too. having a bf now is more like a companion. u love him but, it's not the deep and unexplainable love u've experienced before. it's more like having someone who'll be there for u thru ups and downs, and vice versa, cos u've both been hurt before and u know that the deepest love will always be irreplaceable.

'u must be a little bit naughty, then guys will like.'
ok this is fairly singlish but u get the point. guys do enjoy a lil challenge and don't like girls who say 'yes' to everything. they like 'em naughty and a lil' bitchy. same goes for y girls like bastards and not nerds.

i can't remember all of it but these are the ones that are still firmly etched in my head. after talking to him, somehow i feel lighter.

爱情与聪明没有关联
-Elva, 然后

2007-10-02T13:48:00.000+08:00

blah i m sooo bored of moving.

i think i underestimated myself, thinking that i don't have too much clothes and can move them in 2 or 3 trips to aunt's place.

sad to say, i'm terribly wrong.

u know in dramas, when the wife found out that the husband was having an affair and she will scream, cry, then dump all her clothes into a major suitcase and just drag it outta the house? that's what i'm doing with all my clothes and the suitcase part. gosh, i think i need 5 or 6 trips at the rate i'm going. not to mention that i've only completed one trip and i'm tired of this already.

i've still got my shoes and bags and toileteries to worry about. fortunately, mom has already taken care of all my poly and secondary books/notes and dump them into boxes.

i guess i'll be sooo busy that i won't have time to reminise about the memories i shared with my current flat. not to mention my tutorials that will be due on thurs.

i need HELP!!! >.<

2007-10-02T00:30:00.000+08:00

yay i'm back from Bintan!
all i can say is: tired but FUN! :)

there're tons of events to talk abt during the whole retreat.

*random order

i love my dinners most: gala dinner at 1st night, and romantic dinner by the beach on the 2nd. the atmosphere for both events was perfect and the company was great as well!

tried jet-skiing and it was very thrilling! Bingli and i took turns to ride cos we shared the same 'bike'. i just love the feel of wind gushing past me and i felt so free and relaxed. banana boat was disappointing cos we didn't capsize. :x

team building games wasn't too bad but our group has only 1 guy, and he's really not the macho kind. then, the games were designed in such a way that the group with the most muscles win, not wits. blah so needless to say, u know how we fare la :p

bought many MANY tank tops from the Factory Outlet! and also, 1 more polo tee to add to my collection. whee! but i feel sooo broke now. :( i'm officially on spending ban til the BKK trip.

more bonded with 阿草 now :) we've been thru thick and thin, ups and downs. hehe.
btw, she's Bingli lah. not guy k?

got tan lines now!! YAYY!!!
budden, in return of the nice bikini shape in front, the tan wasn't even. somehow, i got patches of fair skin and i don't understand why. :/ not to mention i have aching and possibly peeling skin.

alright i'm pretty much finished on my trip here. pics to be uploaded later after compiling with the rest.

other things to fret about:
moving house
promotion/transfer and increament
goals achieving
FPOM tutorials
mini-a proj (sighs)
sunburnt skin

back to reality. :(

2007-09-27T02:18:00.001+08:00

YAY thur and fri and next tue on leave!
and sat sun and mon will be spend in Bintan, company trip. got gala dinner, free water sports and some boring trainings to attend, but heck. gonna enjoy myself. :)
means i wont be in office for 6 whole days! woot!

budden, i need to move leh. tons of things to pack and dump.
think this will be a new beginning for me. i'm gonna throw away stuff that marks sad memories. fortunately, LM didn't give me a single tangible gift. hahaha.
it's gonna be a emotional and physically draining process, like digging out all the ugly and pretty memories from underground after so long. sighs.

prayers do bring peace into me. :)

anyway, the most ironic thing is now happening to me.
me, a negative and turning-cynical person, is give positive counselling to a more negative friend.
haha, i dunno to laugh or to cry, really.

2007-09-27T00:41:00.000+08:00

looks like KW suffers the same fate, too.

i'm not alone..

2007-09-26T02:27:00.000+08:00

i'm sick of being single and waiting and waiting...

SOMEBODY DATE ME LEH!!
i promise i'll be nice and sweet and won't bite :)

MUAHAHAHA...
i'm not desperate.. just v tired and getting a little cranky.

2007-09-26T01:06:00.000+08:00

i simply *heart* 91.3fm :)
kept me awake thruout my dozing hour past lunch. plus it's a healthier alternative than eating chocs and snacks.

i think news of my transfer is spreading real fast. now i'm getting 'social calls' now and then and they're all asking if the 'rumour' is true. haha. so fun.

a few yrs ago, i remember my colleagues at Nalco were quite surprised that i'm single. all of them commented i got that 'attached' look.
today, i managed to surprise another one. -_-

so... what and how does a swinging single girl look like??

2007-09-24T00:28:00.000+08:00

went on another house-hunting trip on sunday.
this time, the agent focused on Jurong West 4-rm flats.
saw a flat at street 72 with excellent renovations and selling at reasonable price.

i think the agent know me too well, or maybe i'm easy to read. he already know my standard and which flat i fancy most.

when my mom can't decide between the west coast 3-rm and the jurong west 4-rm, the agent asked me this:
'ok lah, u must set ur priorities right. ask yourself, is location or comfort more important? will u get married within the next few years?'

when he was still halfway between the question, i still couldn't decide.
then, when he asked about the marriage question, the answer came out almost immediately with a sigh.

'i probably will never get married. so i'll take 4-rm lah.'
since i'm gonna stay in the new flat 'forever', might as well get a bigger flat so i won't have to share with bro anymore.

reality sucks.

2007-09-23T04:08:00.000+08:00

it was a fun sat night with PN, Jaz and Junhao :)
thank God for them cos i was pungseh-ed by Wk. -_- all thanks to his thoughtfulness in the first place to call some of my friends. maybe he already planned to fly kite in the first place.

we went to Party World, and then to supper, and then to Labyrinth to chill.
didn't sing as many songs this rd, cos mood was spoilt by certain events that happened. but thankfully, the rest are all accomodating and Junhao's always pushing the remote to me to order songs. haha.
then for supper, had my usual fishball noodles. :)
at Labyrinth, ordered Malibu Pineapple and the alcohol is soo little that i didn't even blush or feel giddy. it's the first time i can finish a glass.

well, it's true that if u go to service without expectation, u'll learn nothing from it.
this time rd, i went seeking for an answer and peace of mind, and i got it. :) Praise Lord.

seriously, i don't understand y most of the guys i met like to fake and play mind games with me. i admit i do look and feel blur, but that doesn't mean i'm naive and stupid. i DO know the signs and enough things that have ensured my survivor for the past 21 years.

i hate this feeling, argh.

2007-09-22T01:04:00.000+08:00

when a person reaches a state when he/she is at the top of emotions, like extremely happy/anxious/worried/sad, it's actually reaching the end of it.
at that very moment when it reaches the peak, the feeling will just drop to a neutral level where it's neither positive or negative. just non-chalant.

that's how i feel like now in many aspects of life.

work.
found out many 'secrets' this week.
the funny thing in my office is that the subject involved will probably be the last to know it. i thought only gossips function this way. now i know my boss likes it this way too.
so, i'm the last person to find out something about myself, again.
apparently, my transfer-cum-promotion will happen officially 1st dec. training will start early oct, 2 weeks later.
i'm only informed TODAY, in the most unpredictable place: the TOILET. gosh.
that's probably how ~~insignificant~~ junior i am, and probably my ~~bitchy~~ boss dun wanna spend her precious time discussing ~~meaningless~~ sensitive stuff like my increament and who is going to be my future dir. boss.
i used to be very anticipated and excited. but now, it's all gone. all i want now is my fair share of salary.

the shift.
how complicated can selling and buying a flat be?
hypocrite buyers, backstabbing, slow processes, underhand methods and many other dark sides of it make it a torture. seriously, i dun mind the packing, moving, house-hunting and renovation stuff. but the people link to the transaction are giving me a huge headache. sighs.

sian. i look forward to a change in environment but, given a choice, i would rather sell it at a later time to a better seller than this one. shucks.

the mini-a project.
i think the magic is gone.
sian. y is it so hard to find the right guy??
if it's not a social norm to find the right guy and get married, i'll not even bother already. just seeing all the couples ard on weekends just make me feel the cringe.
but there are times that i will just think back and feel that perhaps it's best to be single. though the choice is not entirely up to me.

alright after all the rants, i'm gonna cheer up! :)
i'm sure God will take care of me well and whichever way i go, there's a reason to it, and a gd one too.

2007-09-21T01:13:00.000+08:00

it's a darn funny day at work. somehow i can joke abt anything: from the merlion, to the traditional-theme dinner next sat, to work-related stuff.

besides the jokes, we receive Raffles Hotel mooncakes!!!! wheee!! i love the mocha and champange flavoured mooncakes!! yumyum. :)

and lesson's pretty interesting today because it's abt job design. after the lesson, i'm gonna seriously think abt the increament i shld ask for when i transfer over in dec.

besides the busy schedule, i still feel empty.

2007-09-20T00:06:00.000+08:00

ok, i think can confirm all's gone now with my mini-a project. sighs.

sad things aside, the flat transaction is giving me quite a headache. the buyer is turning on her words and is now a tyrant, in a 'friendly' way. *pui* now i feel bad making trouble for the agent cos he's doing this out of goodwill and we aren't paying him more to do the saikang.

am glad to see my dad's putting on weight. :)
it's still a love-hate relationship. sometimes i wish i can just make him shut up but sometimes he's being normal.

and now, the whole world is getting news from boss A about my transfer but i'm not getting any from him. sheesh. and i hate it when boss L referred me as 'the one who is going to transfer'. wth, show some respect bitch!

i'm starting to hate my kid bangs and wish it will grow faster so that i can sweep it side-parted like before.

i had sinful ikea meatballs and diam cake/pie for lunch today! not to mention the thick chicken soup. omggg... i'm soo growing fat. :x

i miss the feeling of being in love. :/

2007-09-16T20:25:00.000+08:00

it's been a happening weekend!

fri:

went to Kuishinbo for a scumptious dinner after work with dearest colleagues and Felix (he simply can't resist the temptation when i told him on thurs night that i'll be going there. tsk). i love it! the cold crabs, ebi tempura, desserts, sashimi, paper steamboat; heavenly! and the ingredients are fresh as well. the only thing i dun really like is the teppanyaki; squids and dory fish v v disappointing.

anyway have to give credit to Felix cos he's kinda 'stuck' when i went to the ladies, with my colleagues bombing him questions as if anything's possible between us. hahaha.

anyway after dinner, i dragged (literally) Felix to esplanade to walk ard a bit. I need some fresh air and peace to digest and relax after a week of work. plus, it's supposed to help in digestion.
on the way we saw some exhibitions and this is soo cute!

ain't this doll cute? :)

spider-dog?

after that, we went to watch I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry.

it's a really fun show! i'll give it 3.5/5. it was alr 1130pm when we decided on this show. i was laughing all the time that i didn't realise when the show ended at 1am.

sat:

house-hunting.
went to 4 blocks in west coast and i really find the environment there nicer than my current one. i liked one of the units, considering the cost including renovations might be affordable too. can't wait to move outta here, even though west coast might be just a few streets away but, i need a new start.

then went to town and rushed to get some last-min shopping done before going to candy's chalet. coincidentally, PN and Junhao were at the same train as me! haha.

Candy's party.
there was a lot of eating (tons of good food) and i love the eclairs and the cake!!! yummm. PN and i had a real sinful time indulging on those chocolate treats. besides the food, i had fun catching up with friends. after cake-cutting, played mahjong and at the end of 2 rds, i won quite a sum. must thank my lucky stars for PN and Junhao who played for me when i need to eat/rest, plus the advise they gave while i'm at it.

PN Junhao

ok i know.. we're a lil' looney.

we love the twenty-one balloon!

finally get a change to take a pic with the busy host.

boredom turned him to this...

didn't take much pics cos there're 2 official photographers alr. just a few snapshots when i'm bored. too bad jaz was sick. :/

at 4+am, thanks to Yukun, PN and i reached home safe and sound :) thanks for the ride!

sun:

date @ vivo
after 4 hours of sleep, went to meet Wk @ vivocity.
well, this is the first time this yr that i went out with another guy, not counting Simone/Felix/Simone; i think gender makes no diff to us anymore. tsk.

anyway, we watched The Invasion (something like 28 Days Later) and had lunch at Carl's Jnr.
the show lasted for 90mins, but it felt like 2 hrs in there, not in a bad way though. it really kept me on my nerves for the whole time. i love Nicole Kidman.

it's been donkey years since i went out on a date and this feels a lil' weird. :/ but i did enjoy myself though i must have been a boring date.
hope things will continue the way it is. maybe i shldn't think too much, that way i wont have much expectations.

2007-09-15T13:07:00.000+08:00

work left me v discouraged and in delusion.

y do we work?
to some it's passion, thus they're not really working but they're living out their dream(job).
to others, which unfortunately forms the majority, for money. out of which a portion will be also, for fame and power.

imo, those who work for any reason except for passion and dreams are the sad ones.
we're supposed to live a life of fufilment, and money/fame/power ain't going to bring that sense of fufilment. it will, only for a very short while. even if u've gotten a huge bonus/payraise/promotion, will u truly be happy? sadly, NO. this kinda stuff only makes u crave more of them, and before u know it u've fallen into a trap. it's gonna be a vicious cycle:

u want a promotion and u get it
feel the 'high' for a short period of time
then u'll get new shit because of the newly added 'responsibilities'
which adds more stress and more political games u need to play
u'll yearn for another promotion in hopes that life will become better.
then it starts all over again.

we're never gonna be contented this way, much less be happy.
and since many of us lead this sad life, y don't u treat ur fellow colleagues, who're in the same plight as u, in a kinder way? don't u realise that we don't enjoy making trouble for u and we're doing this because our clients made us do this, not out of our free will?

if only everyone's more forgiving and more understanding, that we're just here to earn some pathetic bucks back to survive, then it'll be a better world.

2007-09-12T02:10:00.000+08:00

i know this sounds weird.. but i actually find shopping a struggle yesterday, tues.
me?! having a hard time shopping?! omg i really don't know what came to me.
i was sooo moody that i can't even be bothered to reply a couple of smses. sighs.

i'm really soo tired and i dun even have time to exercise.
worse is, i haven't complete my shopping yet.
every morning i have to literally drag myself to work, same goes for school days.
and i'm just sooo tired recently. exhausted.

i need to whine~

2007-09-11T04:04:00.000+08:00

now that i'm waiting for my hair to dry, i've time to do some random blogging.

what happened on monday the 10th:

worked like a zombie and felt like one. i was functioning with 3 hours of sleep, duh.

enjoyed peace without baby R bugging me at work.

people were staring at me (my bangs, more precisely). some laughed and teased, some just kept quiet for me to ask 'what ya staring at? my hair?', some commented 'you cut your hair.' (duh). only Shirley said something real 'y u always cut this kinda blur-look hair?!' is this gd or bad?

i'm officially 阿花, Bingli's muse.

i'm getting more comfortable with my classmates. ^^ lesson's not that boring afterall.

Did a very short (1-2mins) presentation in class. before the presentation i was scared and praying for a smooth one without blunders or embarrassment, after that my heart's racing and i was shaking. but i absolutely can't recall what exactly happened during the presentation! luckily, my teammates said i did well. *phew* maybe the entire world can sense my nervousness and were be nice and save my embarrassment.

i would say the thrill of speaking to a group of more than 4 certainly wins a rollarcoaster or bungee jump anytime.

i've been in my company for more than a year already! that's scary, really.

poor Cindy's down with fever. get well soon! (though she doesn't know abt this blog)

alright i'm running out of things to say.
*tata*

2007-09-11T03:06:00.000+08:00

just great.
i woke up 20mins ago and realised that i haven't bathe, and my make-up's still on my face.

i hope i don't break-out tmr :(

*bathing time*

2007-09-10T01:04:00.000+08:00

sian just gotten a call from Ling2 that i'll need to cover Sephrine for morning duty tomorrow, which means i need to reach office at 7am SHARP.
shit. i'll chiong this post and sleep asap. :p

Saturday was the more-interesting weekend.

i reach TCC earlier and had breakfast cum lunch (woke up at 1pm :p) plus did a bit of studying there with Jess.

fish n chips @ Hans

the tiniest sense for familiarity came when i saw Jess's textbook on genomes and some DNA stuff, but left 5 seconds later when i randomly turned to a page and found out i didn't recognize a thing. sighs. for the first time, my marketing notes seemed interesting. hehe.

and then, i got a shock when i entered the ladies:

seems like the toilet has lost its primary function.
hope it will be cured next week.

after service, went to Coffee Club @ Millenia Walk to chill.

chamomile tea, potato wedges, mango tango

comfort food

happy girl ^^

well, put 2 girls at a cafe and u'll end up with rants, sad stories and never-ending discussions. even after we left, we ended up at Esplanade and continued our conversation with sea-breeze and occasional distractions (armed guards and loud teenagers).

we went home at 2330hrs and by the time i reached home, it's 1250am. all thanks to bus 97; always have to wait at least 30mins for that bus.

my sunday was spent..

watching grey's anatomy till 4am.
waking up at 4pm.
studied at mac's after late breakfast til 8plus.
online and blogging till late.

ending off with this photo i took on sat:

i'm approx. 3.5cubes tall!